Waiting for our Feelings to Follow
How often do you hear the phrase, “Rise and shine”? It’s in songs, posted on billboards, display on logos, and maybe even crosses the lips of parents as they urge their teens out of slumber in the morning. It sounds a little bossy, if you ask me.
But, maybe there’s wisdom in the statement.
Even the Bible gives the instruction. In Isaiah 60, verse 1 states, “Arise, shine, for your light has come, and the glory of the Lord rises upon you. And while this may be prophesy for the future of God’s people, I think there’s a lesson in it for today and an action to take in the present.
If we wait until the absence of struggle or conflict, we may never “rise and shine.” Instead, we will sink and fade. I’m not suggesting that we ignore our feelings or struggles. But I think there are ways we can improve our circumstances with the power of choice. We can choose how we think and respond. While we wait for our feelings to catch up, we can choose to act.
After Ashlynn died, I was in survival mode for the first several months. Darkness settled in. Life was heavy. Dull. Painful. Confusing. And then I couldn’t stand the weight of it. I needed a break from my sadness and grief. And so, I gave myself permission to push pause for a moment. First in small doses. I watched something that made me laugh. I immediately felt guilty, but thankfully, I had a grief therapist who assured me that it was healthy. No need for guilt. I’m fully human and needed to experience a full range of emotions. I needed to make space for the good ones too. Afterall, I had two living daughters who were aged five and two. They needed me to be present and fully alive. Eventually, I got brave and started to expand my breaks from grief. I asked my neighbor if he'd take me for a ride on his motorcycle. I had a friend that I went Christmas caroling with in January with as many leftover candy canes as I could find. People may have thought I was crazy. Who knows? Mostly, though, those I asked to join me were thrilled I wanted to partake in some fun.
I use those same skills I learned nearly twenty years ago even now when I’m struggling to find joy in life. I could go the super spiritual route and pray for joy. Or, I can go create by own. I think both are important tools in our emotional toolbox. In the Bible, David didn’t just fast and pray. David danced and sang praises. In times of trials and hardship, I think having fun IS spiritual.
It looks a little different now and I‘ve given it a name: Five Minutes of Fun. This feels more manageable and accessible than a motorcycle ride. It might mean grabbing my bubble blower, inflating a balloon to juggle, dancing around the house, or making and throwing a paper airplane. It doesn’t solve my problems, but it gives me a break. It lets my brain rest and I often return with clarity and a smile.
Whatever difficulties you face today, I hope you’ll pause and remember to have a little fun. Eventually your feelings and circumstances will shift. And, if you’re in a good season, you’re not exempt. Go… rise and shine.